Diary of a Brain Tumor Patient's Wife

Mar. 8, 1999

Renette Davis

This is a message from my mother:


Paul is getting quite weak, and needs help for everything. Renette has to have someone here around the clock. She doesn't want me to do any lifting. He has to be half carried from the commode to his chair, and to his bed. Tonight he asked if it was necessary to have two people helping him, so Renette told him that the decadron made his muscles weak and he couldn't do it alone. He gets quite upset at times. His parents, brother, and sister were here for the weekend. We managed to take him to church, but it was really hard. I doubt if we can take him next Sunday without extra help. The minister asked Paul's dad to help with communion, so we took communion with him. Paul cried when his folks left.

Paul's nephew was here and stayed for several hours after the others left. We had a great visit, and he was a big help. Later Philip and Karen came over. Today Paul's friend Bob came and stayed for several hours. We worked a puzzle. He is such a good friend. Then some friends from church came and brought us our supper. We sang hymns for a while. Another friend from church and his daughter are here to help for the night. A neighbor who used to babysit for Karen and Philip, brought her son to visit this afternoon. She cried when she said goodbye to Paul.

Paul and Renette have so many good friends, who have visited them. Last night, Paul's friend from work spent the night here, and this morning, he and Renette gave Paul a shower, or should I say that Paul gave them a shower. They were soaking wet. Renette's friend and neighbor took me shopping, and another neighbor shoveled their walk and driveway. They have so much support, and this makes all of this a wonderful, although sad, experience. I feel privileged to be a part of all this outpouring of love and caring.

Philip is moving to the apartment which is closeby tomorrow, and will spend some nights here to help with Paul. Karen comes by almost every day.

It's snowing like crazy outside. We're supposed to get up to 10 inches.

Love, Marie

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Created: June 12, 1999
Last updated: July 21, 2010